...until they know how much you care.

“People don’t care about how much you know until they know how much you care”

 ~Theodore Roosevelt

These are the words that a good friend of mine wrote on his white board, and these are words that I plan on carrying with me as I close the door on a ministry and begin to pursue another.

Last week at work I was reflecting on my past experiences in ministry and trying to glean something from the past few years.  I realize that even though I can be successful at church ministry, I never really fit in with church.  Here is what I noticed working in a few ministries:

-I was more interested in making sure that I had quality time with the group rather than sweating over the number requirement for my group. 

-I was more interested in buying coffee or dinner for one of my group members. 

-Rather than abandoning the 99 all the time for the 1 lost sheep, I wanted to make sure that everyone was cared for before I ran off for the one sheep. 

-I think I may have led people to Christ, but I was more concerned about where their heart was and how I could be Christ to them. 

-And yes, I did skip church one Sunday to drive a few hours to a different state to see two friends that I had not seen in almost a year.

To me, being the church is about caring for individuals.  It’s not about the numbers, it’s not about pleasing people, about making money, it is about being Christ to others.  That happens through caring and loving relationships.

I found that there were distinct qualities that people possessed that endeared me to them.  Two people come to mind immediately.  One was one of my “big sisters” in Virginia and the other a Pastor in Ohio.  Both of them are a bit older than me, but they treated me like a peer and a brother.

Here are some of the qualities that they demonstrated to me:

-Encouraging me and reminding me of who God created me to be.

-Praying for me when I had disappointing circumstances.

-Letting me talk and process life without judging me.

-Following up with me on my life events.

-Enabling me to use my gifts in ministry.

-Giving me pointers on how to improve on my talents, not criticizing.

-Participated with my small groups, and used their wisdom to contribute when they could.

-They confided in me and treated me like an equal, not as someone who is at their whim.

-Most of all, they loved me for who I am… not who I could be, or what I had.  But who I am.

Because I knew that they cared for me, I listened to them… and honestly, I would run through a wall for them if they asked me to.   I hope that you have people in your life like that, because I benefited so much from having them in my life.  They inspired me to be a better Christian.  But most of all, I hope that you can be that person to someone.

I usually have to stop and remind myself about the people that would set aside time every other week to catch up on life and talk shop, pray with me, discuss theology or ministry situations, and dream with me.  It helps me forget the frustrating and painful memories.  It reminds me that ministers will make time for me, not make me a butt of their joke, or only talk to me when they need/want something out of me.  I knew that they cared, and it meant the world to me.  That is what is attracting me to this new option… it’s a career where I can just focus on caring for people.

So that leads me to today.  I am letting that dream go and sending it down the river without me in it.  It might come back some day, I might get into church ministry (or start my own ministry), but for now there is something new coming that I am preparing for.  In that, I can care for people who need him.  I don’t want to put the cart before the horse, but I think I am on the correct path.  I feel at peace about looking into it.

I will definitely keep you updated on the new path, but I want to leave you with this today… honestly care about other people.  In a world that is becoming more and more of a black hole, it is so refreshing to have people that will honestly take the time to invest in others. 

In conclusion, I will repeat the verse from above and challenge you to ask God how that speaks to you.

Is there someone in your life that you need to reach out to?  Is God going to work on your heart?  Do the people in your life know that you care?  Is he preparing you for the next step in your life?  What ever it is, just remember:

“People don’t care about how much you know until they know how much you care”

Go be the influential person... be the caring person.